I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
Randomize