Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
my biography would be titled "haunting truths and dick jokes: a tale of love, loss, and masturbation."
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
