Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
Somedays I wish I were a bird. Then people wouldn't be so grossed out when I vomit
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
I've spent so much time on tinder lately I just tried to left swipe an instagram photo of my neighbor
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
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