we made out on top of his cat.
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
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