i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
