i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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