ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
Randomize
