Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
Just saw some airport workers running through the terminal with liquor bottles. That's my kind of emergency.
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
Randomize