next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
Randomize
