We won't sleep together?
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
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