Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
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