What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
How external is "for external use only"?
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
Just thought of the perfect gift for mom.... how about not telling her about my fourth open intoxicant ticket I got last night?
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
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