Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
We found you passed out clutching your purse. There was 16oz of unopened cheddar cheese inside. You just kept saying SALSA YES.
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
Randomize
