he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize
