I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
Randomize
