I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
Guy in the room next to us in the ER is chanting "I'm jeff and I'm drunk". He's trying to get released to finish tailgating for the Iowa game that starts in 9 hours.
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
Randomize
