What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
Even the bartender felt bad for me
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
Randomize
