Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
Randomize
