Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
He bought me Ben & Jerrys and then apologized for the fact that he was going to fall asleep before we could have sex
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
I’m 95% positive I adopted a bunny last night.
You had cocktails, didn’t you?
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
Randomize
