just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
Randomize
