apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
Randomize
