so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
Randomize