Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
My tweets this weekend consisted of me telling every bar I went to that they were my favorite valentine. I've never felt like more of an alcoholic
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
God, I missed his penis.
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
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