Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
Drunk x Brooklyn = problems getting home. If I don't make it you can have my computer and my bitches. You're welcome.
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
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