I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
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