my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
The best part is every argument that she makes from here on out will be refuted by "Oh hey remember that time you shit yourself wearing someone else's sweatpants at a frat party?"
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
The housekeeper found my huge dildo under the bathroom sink, and another in the living room. I can't get much more single than this.
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Randomize
