why didn't you poke me back
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
Randomize
