That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
Randomize
