im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
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