Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
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