these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
Randomize
