You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
Me. At least after what I've been through.
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
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