she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
Randomize