I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins.
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
I currently don't understand fingers.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize
