Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
I DEMAND FORESKIN
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