you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
I just started an apology with "so I'm sorry about throwing the Brita at your head last night..."
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
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