stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
Randomize
