i just used the Cadillac of toilet papers. For a minute i actually forgot i was even wiping my ass....i thought i was floating butt first into heaven
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
giving a 30 min presentation still drunk is like giving birth, upside down in a pit of snakes while being on fire.
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
I’m going to bedazzle that dick
What does that even mean
No idea, but I guarantee he’ll get hard every time he remembers it
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
Randomize
