I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
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