I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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