yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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