even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
Randomize