You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
To be fair, this is a tequila-while-rewatching-Benedict-Cumberbatch-as-Van-Gogh idea, so I don't know if it will hold up tomorrow.
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Randomize
