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I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
Randomize
