I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Randomize
