home. puking in laundry basket.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
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