He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
The waiter to-go cupped my bloody mary without me even asking. THAT hungover.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
Randomize
