I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
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