So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
i used baking grease as lip gloss
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
it's like that moment that you're driving and realize you're lost except instead of driving i'm just sitting here in my living room drunk, eating a plate of sausages, drinking red wine and just thinking "i'm going to be 28 this year. i know people who are married, with beautiful and well behaved children. where was the wrong turn?"
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
Randomize
