Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
I found a briefcase foll of fireworks in my old bedroom...that's an appropriate thing to bring to a wedding, right?
Look man if you're looking for a voice of reason, you're talking to the wrong woman.
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
Randomize
