I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
Right now I'm in a club where they are passing out glow in the dark dildos by the dozen. I don't think my life will ever get weirder than it is at this moment.
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
Randomize
